Thank Lord for taking me to greater heights in my profession.

Even if my limbs are crippled I shall never let you go.

To be continue...

A devotional morning prayer

11th July 2008




Grant, O Lord my God, that I may never fall away in success or in failure, that I may not be prideful in prosperity nor dejected in adversity. Let me rejoice only in what unites us and sorrow only in what seperates us. May I strive to please no one or fear to displease anyone except Yourself. May I seek always the things that are eternal and never those that are only temporal. May shun any joy that is without You and never seek any that is beside You. O Lord, may I delight in any work I do for You and tire of any rest that is apart from You. My God, let me direct my heart towards You, and in my failings, always repent with a purpose of amendment.

-St. Thomas Aquinas-




" O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer"

-Joseph Scriven


"Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them"
-Psalm 199:165 KJV


O Lord please guard my Heart, May I seek nothing else but the Purpose of thy Will in my Life. Amen
-Ben-

My Portion

Im already in the 8th month of my chambering period. I have gained and learnt much in the place im working. Im loving my work. I look forward to the portfolios and tasks that are ahead before me. I can say with much joy, I enjoy this work so much cos it really makes my experience and faith in the One I love so real. Countless of times, I have stepped into that water of the red sea and see the red sea part before me, How simple faith we need to have on our God and he will part the sea ahead of us.

Recently, even as im in my final months of my chambering term, I, at times cant help but look at my senior LAs and see the vasts difference in experience and knowledge between myself and them. Though there are at times, when I look at my work and opinions are almost as relative as theirs... but in terms of the responsibilities and legal opinion , the diference between us is clear.

I tend to compare myself with them, Whenever they are handed with sucha complicated case where there seems no defence or remedy at all, they/or even one of them would be able to figure it all out. Thats when, at those times, I asked of the Lord, Lord please give me a bigger cup so that i can have bigger portion. My portion from here would mean: the experience , the skill, the sharpness, and responsibility.

I'm not saying that Im coping very easy with my current portion of work, but I desire to "catch-up" to reach a level someday above my LAs. Im frustrated, cos i desire to grow quick. Real quick. I want to handle bigger profile cases. One which one will be remembered. At current stage of my 8th month chambering, Im handling the: 1.Islamic Banking portfolio which is of over 100s of files, not taking into account the number of legal action taken in each file. 2. The whole of private auction in instructions by the RCR, RBR, GSR, BBA department. 3. The huge monitoring of the conveyacing Harmony View Project. 4. The new Portfolio that has been given birth this month, RCC(GoodBank) department. Its a lot of work and responsibility, but yet i feel dissatisfied and desire more.

Tonite I did my devotion( which I rarely get the chance to do so, as I usually spend my mornings for quiet time, and evenings I would go to bed early). I was reading one of my favourite psalm, Pslams16. This Pslams has always been a favourite of mine, cos I have encounter many personal prophecies and confirmation from this chapter itself. Also, It is a Psalms which i relate most to myself personally, this is due to because of the many number of times the word" right hand" is mentioned in this chapter. Benjamin means Son of My Right Hand.

The verse in psalms 16:5
" Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup;
you have made my lot secure."

I know of no greater simplier for all life. Whatever happens is assigned. Does the intellect balk at that? Can we say that there are things which happen to us which do not belong to our loving assigned "portion"? Are some things, then, out of the control of the Almighty?

Every assignment is measured and controlled for my external good. As i accept the given portion other portions are cancelled.Decisions become easier, directions become clearer, and hence my heart becomes inexpressibly quieter. Take note, a quiet heart is content with what God gives. It is enough.All is grace.

My assignment entails my willing acceptance of my portion - in matters far beyond comparison with the trivialities such as; my desire to handle higher profiel cases, for a larger portfolio ( the big apple), for a opportunity to create great PR with the top in the business and properties. We can only know that Eternal Love is wiser than we, and we bow in adoration of that loving wisdom.

After reading thru this whole chapter of pslams. I reflect on my own and realized that it is Response that matters. I was not willing to accept that portion which God has planned for me now. I was pushing for a bigger portion or to say with shame, a "selective" portion. Like as though what God has assigned to me shud be serve to me like Im going on a buffet, being selective of what portion i shud get. With such mentality( which Im ashamed as I think of it) , of getting the Big apple when Im in my 8th month in chambers.

In the end when I reflect upon all that has been consumed in this reading; The choice is ours. It depends on our willingness to see everything in God, receive all from His hand, accept with gratitude just the portion and the cup He offers. Shall I charge Him with a mistake in His measurements or with misjudging the sphere in which I can best learn to trust Him?Is He ignorant of things or people which, in my view, hinder my doing His will?

God came down and lived in this world as a man. He showed us how to live in this world, subject to vicissitudes and necessities, that we might be changed- not to an angel or a legendary adored apostle, but changed into 'His likeness'. The secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.

I have learnt to be humbled by His word and really accept that portion which God has given to me for it is His will doing for my eternal good. The portion will increase as I cont. on to " forget what is behind and strain towards what is ahead, pressing on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus". How dangerous was I to have in this ideology that "it is not enough, I must have a different portion". Having a portion thats bigger/or smaller without God's measurement will not benefit any for His Eternal glory.

Lord, Thank you for your word that is ever so real, may I continue each day O Lord to accept every amount of portion you have given to me and use it for your glory. And may I grow to be more like your likeness as Christ have.


I leave here with this poem written by Lina Sandell;-

"He whose heart is kind beyong all measure
Give unto each day what He deems best,
Lovingly its part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling toil with peace and rest."


Part adapted from Elisabeth Elliot's devotion material: Keep a Quiet Heart

The narrow road ahead.

Its been a while i havent blog.

Over the past two years since coming back to Malaysia from Leeds has been a major change for me.

Even this night as I lay back and look whats ahead of my life. I couldnt help but ask myself the same question i ask Him 5years ago. "Law. Is this your Will for me, Lord?"

My days of chambering will be over in 3months time. I wonder even if I should post my trials in this public web. I guess this blog will help me reflect of what God has called me to be.

God, I'm scared of my career and my profession. Let me not dissapoint you. May everything I do brings a smile to your face.

25th July 2006 RoundHay Foxhound

25th July 2006,
So much has been going on this week. Many of the asians are leaving back to their hometowns. Malaysians are slowly one by one leaving. Kerting, Sia hui and aimee would be leaving this week!.How fast time flies. We all remember the day when we first arrive england. How excited we were then. Now its the time for us to move on and go back to Malaysia and continue with our lives.

Aimee is leaving this weekend. Vincent gave a call to aimee and invited her for a dinner treat at Roundhay's Foxhound. He also invited us (me, roy,siawwan) along for this special farewell dinner he is giving for aimee. Personally Roundhay has always been one of my most favourite places in leeds.

Heres a little info of what i experience in Roundhay throughout my stay in Leeds. Its a huge park owned by some millionaire a long time ago. Heck! his home is in the middle of the park. Its really beautiful. A lot of the yorkshires people go there for walks, chilling, basically enjoying everything nature has to offer. There's 3 huge lakes there too. I bring my friends to roundhay whenever they have nothing to do, or came over for a visit. Somehow, come to think of it, i didnt spend much time with any of the locals at roundhay park. We usually hangout at the hills behind our Lupton Residence.

Theres a restaraunt just right at the entrance of Roundhay Park. Its called Foxhound. They serve great English food. Yes, for once i say english food can be nice. Well i guess its because of the atmosphere in there. The furniture...oh man. CLASSIC!. oh oh oh. and i love thier 10 flavours of mustard which they serve generously.

Well, on this day 25th July 2006. Vincent pick all of us up from our lupton residence. When we arrive, we walked around roundhay park for a while...cos its in the evening. and you know how quick it gets dark in england. We took lotsa pictures on that day. We sengfaja wore bright colors.You will see them later =).

For dinner, i had swordfish meat.The meat is so so. But i soooo love the mustards. mustards on fish, sounds weird hor... but its superb for me. I'm a mega mustard lover! Oh Aimee had to make her order for a second time because apparently the lamb is out. The waitress was really nice when she got back to us after the second order, to tell us that she manage to pursued the manager of Foxhound to give free desserts for us, as complimentary for our patience.What patience??!!? patience to tolerate the simple need to re-order. What great service they serve here.

We had profiterols and some really rich choco cake.The night ended with photo taking sessions. Vincent took us back when its really late. Oh he and lizzie got a gift for her too. A little bookmark which says that "God is the strenght that keeps me on".


What a wonderful evening it was. A memorable one for aimee and the rest of us.
Thank you vincent and lizzie for being a blessing to us.



Desserts

Swordfish! without the mustard yet.

One of the many fountains

Random picture

Yellow,REd, Pink, Purple, Blue

Look at the fountain!

Roys pizza. Which he dislike.lolx

A night to remember for princess Aimee

28th May 2006 Massoc Bbq

Sunlight as bright as 11am at 6am, Squirrels out from their long built winter nest, Frisbee flying across ur window, hearing Linda singing to Aerosmith, ... BBQs

One of the things which i do the most during summer and spring time in Leeds, is going for lotsa bbq outings. Its like a weekly thingyee. Eating out bbq is sooo way different with Malaysia where u have to circum. to the heat. Its 24/7 Genting/or cooler weather during Summer and Spring. Well except for one time it was so mega hot in Spring.


I guess for most of us Malaysians, BBQs are like mamak sessions for us minus the rotis and sirup ais limaus. I really enjoy al;l of the bbqs i attend and organised. We have bbqs just about every where and every place, the parks Lupton Residences, Leeds Hyde Park, Knightsbridge..etc.

Also it is during bbq times, we got to know new friends. Friends of ours will invite friends of theirs. And i guess it is then u relaised how many Malaysians are there in Leeds. I only had 3 bbqs with the locals during my stay at Leeds. One thing i learned from them, is learning how to play frisbee. Correction... you dont need to learn how to play a frisbee... just throw it!

I always thought frisbees are for dogs which are bigger than Cookie. Didnt know there's so much fun playing with it. Seeing the different ways people throw a frisbee. And the hillarious falls people make when they try to catch a frisbee. I got a frisbee of my own too. Got it from Red-5 Store. Coolest stall ever. My frisbee make sounds and its stable.

I learnt the art of preparing a bbq all by yourself. Starting a fire, maintaining the fire, wats the best marinate, wats the best to bring. I just love bbqs then, coming back to Malaysia was difficult because i know the bbqs outings are so little and most wont rather go out/do something else. Cant blame them, cos of the sweaty and sticky effect we get after every bbq.

Back in Leeds, Its so fun to shop for bbq. Go with your friends. dont do it alone. Shopping for groceries is always fun with someone around. At leeds i guess the most common shopping place all of yorkshire go is Morrisons. " More reasons to shop at Morrisons" is their slogan. lolx. Yea, you will end buying lotsa sausages, hams, chicken wings, bbq sauces, corn, and MARSHMELLOWS. Marshmellows is a must! i repeat a must for us.Heating up ur marshmellows by the bbq will give it a crunchy effect on the outside and a nice sweet taste after the crispy cover. Marinate chicken with good bbq sauce. Heinze is the best. A good bbq sauce makes the different. And Honey too. =).

Bbqs have become so much part of our weekly routine that even the girls are quite pro at it too. Talking abt bbqs i heard that in aussie, the people bbq at the beach. Sorta reminds me of batu ferringhi bbqs with a level monkeys. During bbqs, you will see who are the gentleman who are the curi makan the most. lolx. Lotsa things you can observe and have fun with.

Max one time bought a rocket like frisbee which makes rocket sounds whenever it flies thru the air. Miss that toy man. And oh music! Music is damn damn syiok in a bbq. Gives the groovee baby. Pete brought a boomberang in one of the bbqs and it broke one of the windows of lupton residence.

Even when i look thru at my old blog, i notice the number of times i mention the word bbq.

It sucha norm for us back in England. Bbqs brings people together , brings smiles, and truly makes your time in Leeds memorable, well at least it has for me.

Bewow are some bbq pictures, its a Massoc bbq session... 28th May 2006. God Bless!

Me kena buli again. =P

Breakfast at Leeds.

Breakfast is said to be the most important meal of the day. In Malaysia, we have tons of choices for breakfast, the classic warm nasi lemak warp in banana leaf, some good roti canai, economy bihunmee. If you are Penang, breakfast is almost like the most exciting meal of the day. Most coffeeshops are open in the morning. Curry Mee, Hokkien Mee, Loh Mee, White Coffee with Kaya Bread, Dim Sum, Kuihs, Ban Chang Kuih, and many others.

Got this from wikipedia about breakfast.Here's what they say in the first paragraph:
Breakfast is the first meal of the day, preceding lunch or dinner and is typically eaten in the morning. The English word derives from the idea of breaking the involuntary fast of sleep, thus signifying the first meal eaten after awakening. It conveys the exact literal meaning of the Vulgar Latin word disjejunare, which evolved via the Old French disner (Modern French: dîner) to become the English word dinner[1].

Today,hampered by busy morning schedules, many neglect breakfast or skip it entirely. This trend now exist in industrialized nations worldwide, where it is accompnied freduent by replacing local breakfast traditions with modern Western-style foods, often packaged or pre-made.Nevertheless, many nutritionists consider breakfast a very important meal, since it provides vital nourishment and energy for starting the day. Studies have indicated that children
and adol escents whos usually have breakfast generally consumed more daily calories than those who skip this meal and,yet, are less likely to be overweight.

Here in Leeds, breakfast is something i didnt enjoy during my first few months, actually it gives me the oh so homesick of Penang food. Don't you wake up in mornings feeling like " I want to have nasi lemak", " I want hokkien Mee with tons of hue chang". To make it worse, as i work in Burgerking, half of my breakfast of the week are whoopers, or veggie burger.Its not nice kay, try eating whoopers fore breakfast for just a week, and u will feel disgusted d. Max, who lives at Charles Morris Hall will only take their quick energy bars for breakfast, though they have a full breakfast provided, like hams,sausages, french toast,etc. To the typical Malaysian taste, you will grow sien of it. I'm not sure if today Max has figured out a new way of making his breakfast enjoye-able.

That's pretty much my breakfast routine daily. Until somewhere near Spring/ end of Winter, Siawwan taught me the coolest breakfast. Strawberries!
Here's how we do it, you will need:
1) Double Cream (any kind, the branded ones are great, but being economical of me, i get Somerfields' Double Cream) - price: 4pounds something
2) Strawberries - In Leeds Central market they sell 3containers of strawberries for 1pound. There are about 15-20starberries per container. - price: 1pound
3) Choclate Sprinkles/Colored Sprinkles -price: 2pound something
4) Sugar

Once you got all of the ingredients, just mix all of them together to your liking.Of course when i said mix, i dont mean smashing, the strawberries with the double creams and spinkles(eww Dude! that wuld be nasty) . Oh add some sugar, so that the strawberries would be sweeter though the sprinkles would suffice.

Ever since of discovering this cool breakfast, i have been having them as an alternative from the burgers,Its awesome, gives u a sugar high in the morning.I wonder how much will it cost me to make a meal like this in Malaysia. What's the price of Strawberries in Malaysia?

Everytime i display this pciture in MSN, people would presmued that it is sweedish meatballs or to some, they cant picture what it is, but it sure looks delicious.

Stawberries+Somerfields' Double Cream+Colored Sprinkles+Some sugar= My champion breakfast in Leeds.

Now lets blog about lunch... =P